Tangerine or Lemon?

Judy Here. The BIG Kdrama of 2025 is When Life Gives you Tangerines featuring Park Bo-Gum and IU. The show takes place from the 1950's to the 2010's and is classified in the genre of 'Real Life' or 'Slice of Life.' I have pretty much decided I do not like this genre. It is simply too bleak. Let me expand.

This story revolves around the love story of the two leads. He in particular is absolutely devoted to her and Tangerines covers the hardships and difficulties of their early life together including a heartbreaking death. As the couple ages they are replaced by two older actors who are equally good in their parts. No complaint with the acting.

IU (her) and Park Bo-gum; both do a terrific job in their roles.

So what don't I like and what has made this so popular in Korea? I believe for Koreans it is a realistic look back at their society... kind of hyper realistic. (That's what 'Slice of Life' genre means.) For me, it symbolizes a big cultural diference. I hope I'm not mischaracterizing or offending anyone but I found the role of Confucianism oppressive in this series. The young women are treated as second class citizens and bow to the whims of the family. A key scene that typifies this is when Park Bo-Gum, after he has married IU, switches the table he eats at. Instead of eating with the Patriarch & Grandmother he pivots and joins his wife at the 'lesser' table. Whoa... a bold move on his part for sure.

Pat: But he says he is moving to this table to eat with his mother, not with his wife. You're nitpicking here Pat, the point is that he thumbed his nose at propriety and chose a lesser table which exemplifies the rigid societal standards.

The first glimmer of distaste for me came in a scene where one of the young kids of the family knocks over a tin of candy. Mom (IU) scolds him and he immediately begins crying "I need a hug.... I need a hug." No, he needed to be scolded in this Gmama's opinion! This acceptance of what I would call spoiled or bad behavior continues through the series. No one seems to correct bad behavior; either from kids or adults.

Pat: Hmmm…a TYPHOON was coming, Judy, and her daughter had been hurt in a bike accident. First things first! Judy: What does that have to do with the kid's whining?

Another part of Confucianism that I believe comes into play in this show is the responsibility and oppressive guilt that the eldest daughter is subjected to. Her family puts all of their focus into her.... to the point of outright neglecting their second-born son. He is constantly demeaned and made to felt like a second class citizen. Plus they neglect their personal finances to afford her every opportunity to excel; even if she may not want that.

This seems backwards to me. In Korean society, males come first. Why was she singled out to be the alpha child in this family? I think she got treated this way because she became a surrogate for her mother who was never allowed to excel in school because of her financial and social circumstances. Her husband even bought into this for feeling guilty she hadn’t had those chances. ~ Pat

I understand the desire for our kids to do 'better than us' that many of us strive for. But the disregard for the people as distinct and separate individuals is disturbing to me. I hope those of you with more insights into Confucianism or Korean Society might provide some insight.  I just read an article in the Korea Times that points out that Confucianism was 'corrupted in the late Joseon Period when it adopted gender biases and ended up with the 'bugye' system; a patrilineal, male-dominant system' so perhaps it's not Confucianism that I'm objecting to. Certainly I am not educated about this. Mainly I love Kdramas and almost all of what is presented I adore. This show was an exception for me... it turned out to be a lemon for this Gmama. Perhaps my 'individualistic American attitude' is coloring my opinion?

Time to face the music, Judy, and I don’t mean K-pop. As you said, you don’t like this genre of Kdrama. You prefer the the fantasy, and that’s okay. I loved this show, and I especially enjoyed how realistic it was.

It’s interesting that when we started this blog several years ago, we said we would never critique the shows we watched, and here we are killing it!

Gulp! Maybe Pat is right and I should not be posting things like this? Mea Culpa! As I said at the beginning it's a huge hit and many, many people think it's one of this year's best shows.